There is so much talk about raising emotional intelligent children without the slightest knowledge or awareness that emotional intelligence already exists innately in children and it is something that is integral to a child’s personality. Children aren’t ignorant of a positive trait as raw, basic and something so natural and integral to them as emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence isn’t something that is inimical to them. It is a quality that most kids are born with, it is inherent and intrinsically present in most children. Emotional intelligence like many gifts and talents is an inborn trademark quality of a child.
Emotional Intelligence is Intrinsic to Children
Most children are blessed with emotional intelligence and as parents we only need to further harness, nurture and strengthen it.
As adults we may ignore and turn a blind eye to this powerful characteristic or feature in ourselves which in fact once harnessed and honed can empower us in deciding judiciously and making the right choices but children and babies right from the time they are born start to use this dimension in them rather effectively. Babies use and leverage their emotions for personal motives and individual gains. They cry when they want their physical needs like hunger to be met and when their emotional requirements aren’t fulfilled. They also cry when they are hurt or in discomfort and it comes naturally to them to cry for attention both literally and figuratively.
It is only emotionally intelligent beings that can tune into their own signals and interpret them adroitly. Many babies and kids interpret and comprehend human behaviour in their own unique individual style. They are reasonably aware of how to accomplish their jobs and attain their goals. They are clear about the channels they are required to navigate to achieve their aims. Children intuitively know and understand the rules to negotiate and are aware about the important figures with whom their engagement and involvement is necessary to derive their desired outcomes. They instinctively know the primary players who would be in charge of listening to them attentively and fulfilling their needs. The little ones at once start establishing deeper connection with their primary players.
Children can easily feel the pulse or vibes of an adult and will just evade all self-absorbed people or the ones who are likely to cold-shoulder them. Most kids enjoy playing favorites as they already have an inkling which people would be supporting them. The brats that they are often take pleasure in manipulating the grown-ups by adeptly playing mind games and emotional tricks on us. They are competent at playing with our emotions and use the sensitive facet in adults to their advantage. My daughter exactly knows when to approach me for favors. She is clever at reading my mind as well as sensing my moods and emotions. Consequently, she comes to me when I am usually in a relaxed frame of mind especially when I am free from my routine responsibilities and chores. On those days when I am seen being busy she easily takes the cues and finds something on her own to keep herself occupied. This very act is a testimony to her emotional intelligence.
Numerous children testify their emotional intelligence in a multitude of ways. They constantly demonstrate and express it creatively and innovatively in their own inimitable fashion. One of the obvious give-aways that bear witness to their high emotional intelligence is how they instantly, instinctively and spontaneously gravitate towards smiling and happy faces overlooking the busy and indifferent adults. They not only use their own emotions effectively but also of others to their advantage.
Most children effortlessly succeed in manipulating their personal feelings as well as of others for personal gains. As they are usually in a general state of heightened consciousness and awareness they are easily perceptive to the vibrations that as adults we constantly emit. They are naturally sensitive to both the positive as well as negative energy that the grown-ups reflect and are quick to see the mental patterns or designs of individuals. Small wonder they are highly susceptible to pick up the emotional patterns of the people around them as they grow older and more prone to lose touch with their own quintessential individual characteristics that actually make them stand out from the ordinary. Another vital component of measuring emotional intelligence is empathy which several kids are abundantly blessed with.
As a baby my daughter got an inkling of the tremendous love and affection that I possessed for her. She would notice how challenging it was for me to take my eyes off from her innocent face and immediately sensed my weakness in fact using it for her personal benefit often tricking and beguiling me. She definitely manipulated me emotionally by playing on my weakness to get her way. As parents let us understand and acknowledge that emotionally competent children have arrived. Our task is categorically cut out now as we just have to further build upon by nurturing, strengthening and reinforcing their emotional intelligence to gently guide them so that they would confidently and successfully follow their own hearts to pursue the dreams of their souls!